What a day.
Tired. Drained. Restless.
I lead the musical form of worship this morning with my acoustic guitar and friend Jessisca singing with me. It was strange. We have been without accompanying musicians for awhile now, and I really thought I was used to it but it was kind of missing an element today. Not sure. It might have been my choice of songs, and their order... Hmmm. There was some other weird distractions before we started. Must be a trend. I've now gone like 3 out of the last 4 weeks with a something going a-miss at church, some sort of scuffle or confrontation.
I need a break. But there isn't really anyone else to step in, so I carry on. I don't necessarily need a break from the music. Just the drama that is associated with it.
Then at the end of the time I kind went all stream of conscience on everyone and blabbed and cried about the persecuted church and my own short comings. Not sure if it was appropriate. People are used to me being transparent and stuff, but the weird thing is I don't have a normal relationship with anyone where I can share this stuff so I do it in public, from the stage or from the blog. I'm not really sure that is the healthiest way.
Then after church we had a pot-blessing, (or whatever we're calling them these days...) and then we came home as my wife had to work this evening. After she left I was tempted to veg on the couch for the rest of the day but felt like I should head over to our Lifeline feeding ministry in town where we hand out groceries and soup and stuff from a converted blue school bus. So Noah and I headed over there and it was a big crowd. Really big. Noah seemed to fit in with the crowd of mostly homeless and recovery folks. He was a bit of a spaz though and I had to kind of chase him around. He'd help for a second, then try to climb all over everything. In the middle of it, I kind of misplaced him for a second to find that he had cut into the food lineup and went to window so he could get a cup of juice. It was kind of cute, he could have just asked one of the volunteers but he just assumed you had to get in line like everyone else.
Another touching moment that I will probably remember for the rest of my life made our trip there totally worth it. It's hard to explain but put it this way, Noah is active. I spend most my time wrangling the kid like a steer. He kind of invades folks space so I have to watch him. Well, I noticed he was sitting at the rear of the bus and a lot of the people we were serving try to cut back there as to bypass the line up. This one lady was doing that, and I saw Noah start to talk to her and kind of start his "space invading". I started over there and he was suddenly giving this lady a huge hug. I picked up my pace thinking this person may not want this attention. As I got there I noticed he was trying to touch her face, I looked and saw she was wearing sunglasses with a big bandage beneath them. Then he did something I've never have seen him do, he asked if he could pray for her, and as she kind of started to object, my 5 year old ignored her and prayed "Jesus, please make this ladies eye feel better, amen". Then he got all spazzy did a flying leap off the back of the bus and I had to chase after him again. It all happened so quick, and he prayed like it was the most natural thing he's ever done. It was a precious and bizarre moment all wrapped up into one. We pray for him when he's hurt so I guess he thinks that's what you do!
Hmmm. Who knows? Long day. I'm happy to report that I was able to veg on the couch for awhile this evening after returning home. Now I'm off to bed!