So....., Jason asked for some fake resolutions - here goes.
10. I will wear Men's underwear.
9. I will devote much of my time, energy, and resources to spreading the "good news" that in large part, the Monkees didn't play their own instruments.
8. I will try out for a spot on America's next top Model.
7. I will gain at least 30 pounds.
6. Me and my family will move back to California and open a tanning salon in Newport Beach.
5. I will watch more T.V. - I've just been missing out on lots of good stuff.
4. I will avoid the Dentist at all costs.
3. I will give up fishing and hunting for good - it's just barbaric.
2. I will not miss watching even one pro sporting event if it is being aired on my local TV network. (Football, Baseball, Basketball or Hockey) I promise!
1. I will quit giving to my local church and instead support all of Oprah's pet causes.